Being Shy Is Hard!

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If you’re shy, you can learn to get control over your shyness. An important step in learning to overcome shyness is to watch what kinds of messages you’re giving yourself as your self confidence begins to plummet along with your self-consciousness starts to grow.

The reason it’s necessary to notice your inner thoughts when you are feeling shy is because you need to know and understand the negative messages that go through your mind. When you understand what messages you’re sending to your self, you can actually change them and learn to get control over your shyness. You can learn to change your mood from one that is extremely negative and fearful to one that’s positive and relaxed. The messages that you send to yourself Animal control near me have a large effect on your self image and your internal sensations of confidence.

The next time you are in a situation where you begin to feel shy and insufficient, stop and ask yourself what you messages you’re saying to yourself. I’m not as cool as the other kids.” Or, “I’m not as smart as the other people in this office.” Or, “I am not as good looking as the other girls at this party.”

Deep inside, you are sending yourself some sort of very negative message about yourself, and then you are believing it and acting upon it. The end result is that you become fearful and lack confidence. To get control over your shyness you need to bring these negative messages to the surface and examine them in the light of day.

When you identify negative messages you’ve been telling yourself, you need to begin examining them to see what real evidence you have that they are true. Whether the messages are true or not, you also need to ask yourself, “So what?”

For instance, imagine that you’re saying to yourself, “I’m not as cool as the other children; I shouldn’t be here.” It’s only a judgment. Who decides what’s cool? Does that mean I ought to be miserable? Does that mean I don’t have a right to talk to other men and women? Can I only accept myself and look for men and women who will accept me also?”

The reason it’s necessary to notice your inner messages is that all of us have assumptions and beliefs that run our lives. In plenty of cases we are not even aware of the beliefs we have, but in some instances they have very negative effects on our lives. If you are currently residing in shyness and isolation because of some beliefs that you could actually challenge and change, this is good news.

It means that you once you uncover the underlying beliefs that produce your shyness much more devastating than it needs to be, you can begin to change. You can start challenging your negative beliefs that make you maintain your shy behavior and you can begin replacing them with positive beliefs that will let you be a lot more sociable and outgoing. You can get control over your shyness and finally begin to have the social life you truly want.

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